With big blue eyes and one missing tooth, she is a girl, no longer a baby. She is funny and loud and so excited about growing up. She is embracing her fifth birthday with joy and pride. She is especially interested in understanding how little she once was, now that she is, in her own words, so big.
“Mommy, do you remember when I was zero?” G asks, as I tuck her into bed for the night. I know she means when she was an infant; she was never a zero.
“Yes, when you were firstborn,” I say, smoothing her pale hair from her forehead.
“How big was I? Was I this big?” She holds her hands wide, stretched out almost as tall as she is now.
“No,” I reply, bringing her hands together to a space of about 21 inches. “You were this big.”
G thinks about this for a bit, but she is tired, so sleep pulls her in. I kiss her good night, and leave the room, turning down the light.
“Good night, baby.”
I’ve had 1,825 days of good mornings and good nights with her, and they have gone by so fast. I measure time now by the steps she takes, the new words she learns, and the questions she asks.
She woke up early this morning, slipping into my bed for a snuggle.
“Mommy!” she whispers. “Mommy, today I am five!”
I hold her close. “I know. Happy birthday!”
I softly sing her the Happy Birthday song. She is indeed happy, already dreaming of the perks of five: permission to swim in the big pool at the recreation center, an upcoming birthday party, and the start of kindergarten. She looks ahead. I, for this moment, look back. I see a small baby sleeping in her crib, a toddler taking her first steps and laughing at something funny her big brother did, and a preschooler learning to use scissors and playing dress up. I see a head full of curly hair that has now straightened out, I hear her first word (“dada”), and I remember the awful day when she broke her arm. But that is the past, and she has much ahead, with many good mornings and good nights.
Her brother reminds her that there may be presents for her birthday, and they are off, out of my bed, to search for the small pile I placed in our den last night. Soon, I am called to join them, to start the birthday celebration, to welcome five.
Read my post to my daughter on her fourth birthday here.
Happy 5th bday G! I don’t know why, but this post made me cry…. sometimes I wish I could stop time. Love you and love to your beautiful G on her 5th bday!
Oh, Phyllis! Thanks for reading and thanks for your lovely comment! xxoo
Happy birthday! She is adorable. I love the conversation. My daughter was as inquisitive.
The questions never end! She keeps me on my toes!
Time goes by just so fast.
My youngest turned 3 this spring and I still remember vividly the feel of her kicks inside of me. I miss those days but I treasure these, too.
Thanks for reading, Caroline!
Awwww, happy birthday to your little girl! My youngest turns four tomorrow (7/31). It’s amazing how fast the time goes by…
Happy birthday to your family, too, Diane!
I got all weepy too! So sweet. Happy birthday, G!
Thanks, Melissa! xxoo
Apparently my allergies got super bad while reading this…
My daughter just turned 3 last month and I had all the same thoughts but you wrote them down so eloquently.
Thank you for sharing.
Ooo, thanks for reading and for your kind words, Heather. It’s so hard when they grow up so fast, isn’t it?
Aw, Happy Birthday, G! This is so precious. These years go by all too quickly.
Thanks for reading, Mel!
This is just lovely. Happy birthday, little girl, and congratulations, Mom.
So very sweet. I write posts for my kiddos on their birthdays too. It will be so precious as they get older.
Aw, so sweet! Enjoy that time because before you know it your kids will be headed off to college…
Happy happy birthday to your beautiful daughter! My son just turned five in July and I couldn’t (and still can’t) resist looking back at how tiny he once was. Five was an extra fun birthday for us – it was the first time he really started to look forward to his birthday and got that he was going to be five. Such magical times!!!